It was the late 70’s when I started dating, a period that seems both long ago and just yesterday. It was the mark of distinction to show some chivalrous behavior, even if it was a front put on for my parent’s benefit. Being put on full display meant that my date had to behave himself―keep his hands where they could be seen, help me with my coat and hold the door open. Our date would inevitably end with a kiss, which always seemed the most nerve wracking part of the date…not so much the kiss, as the occasional slip of the tongue! Yuck!
By college, I was a serial monogamist and had already done the dating circuit. I probably had more different dates in high school than afterward. Having experienced several long faithful relationships, here is what I observed. During the early stages of the relationship―the dating phase, chivalry would take center stage, if only long enough to reel me in; but after the thrill of the chase was over, chivalry became just another word, and a lost art.
The days of men who boldly and without remorse did things intended to protect and defend the honor of a woman, are long gone. Chivalry appears to have ‘checked out.’ Nowadays, the fear of committing politically incorrect acts and the backlash of militant feminists, has scared them into hibernation―or so the masculists claim.
Are all women now indoctrinated with the anti-male feminist agenda? Are we lumped into a scary bunch of ball-busting, man-hating feminists campaigning for their demise? If so, then chivalry may in fact be dead. Who knew that Gloria Steinem and Billie Jean King would single-handedly neuter a gender!
There will always be those that believe that the slightest acts of chivalry, belittle and degrade women―but they are the minority and possibly part of the Steinem family tree.
I don’t know whether women gave up on chivalry or men gave up on themselves. But what I can tell you, is that I speak for the majority of women when I say, that we miss you and that lost treasure buried somewhere deep in the sea of humanity. That chivalry.
Will it make a comeback or has it checked out for good?
I hope it will, because smart girls deserve better; and I would hate to think that because of that minority of ‘indoctrinated’ women, men have lost their cajones.
So please, get over your gun-shyness and come out of the cave. You’re looking a little pale.