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Author Archives: Karen
New York City Haters: Where’s all the Love?
Travel anywhere in our great country and tell people where you are from (your accent will probably give it away), and you’ll soon be paraphrasing Sally Field’s infamous acceptance speech: “You hate us right now―you really hate us!” The truth … Continue reading
Posted in The Scarlet Dogma
Tagged boroughs, center of the universe, free entertainment, love-hate, Manhattan attitude, naked Cowboy, New York, New York City, New York City Haters, New Yorkers, NYC, NYC inhabitants, people watching, Rockefeller Center, self-centered, subway, Times Square, too much traffic, United nations
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Dater Beware: Not so New and Deadly Mutations of Men to Watch out For
Even if you’re the most intuitive of women, with no fears of intimacy, co-dependency, boundary issues, or run-of-the-mill neurosis, there are those men that can slip through the cracks, ruin an otherwise good life, and make you wish you had … Continue reading
Posted in Dishin' Dogma
Tagged adultery, affairs, ambiguous guy, aspiring-to-be, beware, cheating, condescending, Dater, dating, deadly men, deception, devalued, dirtbag, disaster, disposable, disrespect, divorce, dreamer, ego gratification, entitlement issues, heartbreak, liar, loser guy, manic depressives, married man, narcissistic, ogling, overinflated ego, personality disorders, prick, problematic men, schizophrenia, self-proclaimed Renaissance man, self-serving, slut, SOB, stay away, suicidal, swoony, tongue lashing, unhappy, wandering eye, wandering pecker, warning signs, will never mature
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Being on the Other Side of Young Just Means, Being on the Other Side of Young
We all have to come to that epiphany at some point—either cower at the notion of aging or embrace the fucker. And occasionally, a bitch slap is what it takes to put our heads in the right place. Screw women … Continue reading
Posted in The Scarlet Dogma
Tagged 40's, aging, brassy, confidence, experience, flirtatious, get laid, hormones, horny, Hot, indulgent, loved, maturity, men, middle-age, naked, no-nonsense, older women, other side of young, pent-up lust, playful, respected, self-confidence, sensibility, sex life, sexually desirable, twenty-somethings, women, youthful cheeks
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Female Midlife Crisis – Embracing Middle-Aged Madness
If “midlife crisis” has become such a cliche, conjuring up images of straight men in toupees, speeding around in red convertibles with a twenty-something blond all sprawled in the front seat, then what are we women headed for when it’s … Continue reading
Posted in The Scarlet Dogma
Tagged an affair, crazy old bats, female midlife crisis, hormonal chaos, middle-aged loony, midlife sexuality, more passion, nip & tuck, red convertibles
2 Comments
On Valentine’s Etiquette – So, What’s a Guy to do that Ain’t got a Clue?
Ah, Valentine’s Day―another holiday that manages to inspire warmth and contempt in the masses. Whether you’re stupid crazy in love, in a new happy fog, or unwaveringly single, there apparently is some form of Valentine’s Day etiquette to abide by … Continue reading
Posted in Dishin' Dogma
Tagged about women, candles, chocolate, Emily Post, floral bouquet, heart-shaped candy, in love, long stemmed rose, love, manners, raising polite kids, romantic dinner, roses, teaching etiquette, Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day etiquette
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Distracted Like a Fox – Trapped in a Hurricane of Hormonal Suckery
You’ve probably been wondering where I’ve been the past ‘few’ months—why for two years, I’ve been consistent in spewing my ‘dogma,’ and then poof, I’m a one-hit wonder. So where have I been? Good question. The details are a bit … Continue reading
Posted in Dishin' Dogma
Tagged absent-mindedness, age, brain-racking, champion, confident 50's, confusion, Deepak, depleted, Distracted, Dr. Oz, early menopause, easily distracted, fabulous, falling down, Hormonal, hot flashes, indecision, insomnia, lack of hormones, loss of diction, memory lapses, menopause, migraines, Oprah, pain, power keg, psyche, random weeping, sassy, self-worth, stupor, Suckery, suffering, terror, torturtured, unfamiliar symptoms, useless, Valium, zen
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Fifty is the new “Fuck You, Who Cares How Old I am, I’m Fabulous…or at Least Working on it!”
The big day has come and gone, striking like an unpredicted cyclone and sucking me into an era of senior quips, early bird specials and a whole slew of new annual exams and procedures. HAPPY FREAKIN’ BIRTHDAY to me! My mindset … Continue reading
Posted in The Scarlet Dogma
Tagged AARP, age, age is just a number, bitchslaps, dating online, denial, fabulous woman, fifty, gotten naked again, half a century, half-century mark, happy birthday, hormones, kegel, midlife sexuality, milestone birthday, old, orgasms, senior quips, sex
5 Comments
Maladjusted and Dysfunctional: The New Frontier
“There’s been an accident. The new hearse is totaled. Your father is dead. Your father is dead, and my pot roast is ruined.” –Six Feet Under As much as we try to sugar-coat them with terms like “eccentric” … Continue reading
Posted in Dishin' Dogma
Tagged deep dark secrets, dysfunctional family, Edith and Archie Bunker, excommunication, family dynamics, family feuds, fear and hatred, interfaith marriages, Jewish women, Maladjusted, neurosis, new frontier, overprotective, repressive parents, resentment, Six Feet Under
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Oh America: Ye Prudish Prigs!
What’s all the fuss about exposed willies and ta-tas? Unless you’ve sworn off all media recently, you’ve almost certainly heard that back in August, the royals got their knickers in a knot when nude photos surfaced of one very fine … Continue reading
Posted in Dishin' Dogma
Tagged America, Buckingham Palace, Camilla, Charles, cheeky chap, damage control, Diana, divorces, Duchess of Cambridge, Edward, English royalty, exposed willies, Fergie, gaffes, hotel suite, indiscretions, Las Vegas, media, mistresses, Ms. Middleton, naked, nude photos, photo scandals, prigs, Prince Harry, Prince Philip, Prince William, prudes, prudish, prudish tendencies, prudishness, royals, Sarah Ferguson, Sin City, strip billiards, stuffy Brits, ta-tas, toe sucking, topless
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It’s my Party and I’ll Smile if I Want to!
There is nothing more offensive and more likely to bring out the Cinderella bitch in you, as a virtual stranger saying to you, “Smile! Things can’t be THAT bad!” Are you kidding me? Who are these clueless clods to think … Continue reading
Posted in Dishin' Dogma
Tagged be a good girl and smile, feminism, I'll smile if I want to, insist women smile, smile, smile on command, telling me to smile, the man who says smile, things can't be that bad
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Boundary Issues – the Hot New Malady Du Jour
You know that sappy-eyed look you get when someone is falling head-over-heels for you? You know the look. The soft, runny, weak, and worshipful, I’m-crazy-in-love-with-you-and-will-put-up-with-anything-because-I’m-a-doormat look, that annoys the shit out of you? Yeah, that’s the one. You hate the … Continue reading
Posted in Dishin' Dogma
Tagged blame, boundary issues, boundary-challenged, control freak, controlling, distrustful, dysfunction, emotional tresspassing, fear confrontation, malady, narcissist, overbearing, permeable membrane, plagued, provoked, relationship, rigid, sappiness, self-respect, tentative, trust instincts, weakness, worthlessness
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Year of the Woman: Purging the Stigma and Flying Solo
Too many of us broads seem to have gone astray, so at the risk of sounding like a Gloria Steinem groupie, I need to reiterate something here. “A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.” Yeah, yeah, … Continue reading
Posted in Sassy Single Mamas
Tagged empowered, feminism, feminist era, feminist Movement, fish needs bicycle, Ghost Executive Group, Gloria Steinem, kinship, little lady, male shortage, men, Michele Loreto-Chase, militant feminists, panty girdle, propoganda, relationship, repression, seventies, singleton, sisters, stigma of solo, taboo, woman needs a man, Women's Liberation, Year of the Woman
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Ode to Guilt & Shame: The Stigma of Solo
For those of us who have ever experienced an unusually long dry spell in between Mr. Rights, the humming and tapping of our feet, waiting for that special someone to trip over us can feel like an entire decade. Millions … Continue reading
Posted in Dishin' Dogma
Tagged alone, anxiety, biological clocks, boyfriend, fulfilling relationship, getting laid, guilt, jealous resentment, mate, miserable, no shame in being lonely, panic, pathetic life, propaganda, self-esteem, shame, shame of solo, singlehood, stigma of solo, tragic
2 Comments
When Crazy is Wrapped in Beautiful, it’s Hard to Keep on Walking
(inspired by July post, “The Enticing Breed of the Psychopathic Woman” …partial excerpts of previous comments by Minka Fieldstone & Karen Catalan) Like moths to a flame, we are seduced by that which can kill us. We all want to … Continue reading
Posted in The Scarlet Dogma
Tagged Angelina Jolie, bad boys, bad girls, beautiful, crazy, crazy bitch, crazy wench, danger-zone, dysfunctional relationship, fatal attraction, fix him, madonna-whore complex, male ego, naughtiness, self-destructive, sensible man, sex, sexual dynamo, sexually unfulfilled, sexy, slut, tame beautiful beast, tame her, tame the wild beast, tattooed, tomcat in heat, wild one, wildcat
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Next Stop, Intercourse―Pennsylvania, that is
Unless you’ve been hiding under a rock the last few decades, you’ve probably heard of the slew of oddly named Pennsylvania towns in or around Lancaster County. There’s a story about a traveler who is looking to Mount Joy in Intercourse, … Continue reading
Posted in The Scarlet Dogma
Tagged "Witness", Amish country, Bird-In-Hand, Blue Ball, Climax, Entercourse, Harrison Ford, Intercourse, Intercourse Pretzel Factory, Lancaster County, Lickdale, PA, Pennsylvania, Pennsylvania Dutch, Virginville
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City Girl Amok in Amish Country
I’m giddy with excitement. Environments are changing…the mind cleansing. This sassy, snarky, city slicker has shoved off to Amish country. Complicated and befuddled ex-New York woman, now residing in an uncomplicated, farm-ridden, Amish livin’ country. Wait. I think I hear … Continue reading
Posted in The Scarlet Dogma
Tagged "Witness" Harrison Ford, Amish country, Amish straw hats, bearded men, black suits, bonnets, city girl, city girl in Amish country, city slicker, horse and buggy, New Yorker, Old Order Amish, peace, sassy, scarlet, snarky, suburbia, tranquility
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The Enticing Breed of the Psychopathic Woman
Remember when sex couldn’t kill you unless you lost control of the car? What is it that makes the seemingly sane man seek out the certifiably crazy? These otherwise smart guys can’t seem to stay away from those shiny poisonous … Continue reading
Posted in The Scarlet Dogma
Tagged actresses, beautiful, cerifiably crazy, crazy, crazy ass bitch, demented, deranged, men, models, Naomi Campbell, nymphos, psychopath, psychopathic, rage, sane men, sex, wild sex, woman, women
2 Comments